We had set a date for last night…
In the morning I asked what time, and she said 8. Id to work down the street till 7, so I offered 7:30.
I should have just shut up. I mean, it didnt even matter, it was just more compfy for me… But left a bitter taste all day.
Anyway, I dressed nice, went to my jobs and was done at 6. Wasted time in book stores and was on my way there 7:20… I asked if shes anywhere near relaxed or if I shall wait a bit. She asked to wait. That very second we had a thunderstorm with heavy rain that flooded streets.
She said I can come, but shes cleaning and wants to shower. No problem. I sat there, waited and watched. She was nervous. Hehe.
We went to get some pizza n wine, and on the way to the store, I just took her hand.
Its nice. The moment we are close, our bodies touch. We sat on the balcony for dinner, close to each other.
Then, movie night. A cheezy romantic music movie. A good one though.
She asked if she can put her arm around me the second we sat. We saw the movie, curled up together, fingertips wandering over arms, a few stolen kisses.
I feel relaxed. Usually, its this rush, a whirlwind. But she keeps telling me she needs to take it slow and it really relaxed me. Cause I dont feel like shes just playing games. Cause I think she will slowly walk to me. Make us find a balance.
When I walked to her, yesterday, I thought I hope she wants to keep me for a bit. Because I think I want to keep her. I want her in my life.
Shes different. Shes normal and behaving grown up. We click.
She made me shiver last night, when her hand ran over my tattoo, and her fingertips drew along the lines. She made me smile when she asked me how many stars are there, and I said I dont know. I dont. Never counted. Its 18. She counted.
Sometimes, my head acts up. Yea nice, depression thing. Sometimes it tells me stupid things. I dont tell her all of them. I just feel totally insecure for a moment. Because she doesnt write or something. A moment later I know shes just working. Stupid head. But over all, Im relaxed.
I can only talk about my side here. But I want to get to know her. Be with her. Find out, what there might be.